The Mock Updates Announcement Thread v3.14

[LeManiaque]

Let off some steam. In this thread, you are the one sharing Amazing Update Announcements for the T11 community.

Please keep your Incredible Updates respectful, and have fun.
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Exciting news, with v3.14 when you lose 2 matches in a row your Brilliant Assistant Manager will take over training and tactics duties while You try your hand at running the Parking Facility. Opportunities to advance to cleaning the Club Museum floor will follow for Parking Managers with the right attitude!

#BadUpdate5.6
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Edit: (@mods, if this is too provocative or gets out of hand, please shut it down)

[LeManiaque]

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For our latest trick, now all players will have their quality displayed in Exciting Binary Format! Now you'll know for sure that your 01110000 quality striker is miles better than the 01101001 quality defender trying to stop him!
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Sorry, but we realize binary is confusing to players in league 01, so we're updating to give the inexperienced players base-10 format, and we'll keep binary for the "experienced players" in levels 010 and above...

[LeManiaque]

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A surprise change for our Favorite Managers! From today, some characters on the auction market are professional basketball players, but since we won't share stats or preferred sport, you'll never know who you really want on your team and can bid up a storm for every player at random! Join the bid war fun!

[LeManiaque]

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Today we bring all teams together, so the very best players can go from the Top of the World team to an After-School Junior Squad.

Experience and Quality are just like magic, all is illusion. See these two guys? What does one have the other doesn't? Messi plays for Barça; his 3 year old son is starting at FC Barça School, preparing for the Barça Youth Academy.... But why wait!? Today we let you buy him for $200 million, give him all the stars and put him on FC Barcelona direct with his papi!

[LeManiaque]

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We've listened to your feedback for many years, so we changed all your circle players into squares! It's new, it's better, trust us - you've always wanted square players! More angles!

[BridgeGoth]

We've listened to your feedback and have a great announcement to make!

Starting with version 6.0, if you lose but feel you were trolled, you can now keep replaying the match until you get the result you want! You can do this as many times as you want but only keep the best!
The following conditions must be met:
-Your overall quality must be higher
-The opposing manager must not be present
-You must have at least 60% possession

This change will reflect what the user feedback has been requesting for a long time, that if these 3 things happen, you should never lose and we have finally updated to reflect this!

Thank you again for your feedback!

[nash123]

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We've listened to your feedback for many years, so we changed all your circle players into squares! It's new, it's better, trust us - you've always wanted square players! More angles!

It sounds like an Apple annoucement.



Folks, we have listened to your feedback. Today, we introduce the end of tanking. If you put ST to keep a clean sheet, he will act like a real GK. Or you put a defender as ST, don't worry, he will score you a lot of goals. BUT... that's not all: If you play with no defenders or no ST or play only over the wings, every player will take a regular position to balance the lack on the pitch. Do you think, that's all?
No. We know it's annoying to find tactics and formation to beat your opponent, so we decided to set you team automaticly to a counter formation.

[nash123]

Thank you, for your feedback about the recent update. The huge playerbase on FB moaned about the new changes, because they can't understand, why they acutally lose. Today we introduce the new amazing system:
- we removed positions and attributes. all your player are able to play on every position on the field.
- we give all human manager an own league/cup/CL/NML. That means, a human player will face only 1% bot-teams at every competition
- for a small monthly amount of cash, we also removed loss and draw for your team (note: this is the best way, to avoid troll results).

We hope, you enjoy the new system.

[CM-16]

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We are glad to announce about our new ads system

Now instead of ads, you will be watching 3 minute Youtube videos and you will receive one booster for each Youtube video watched, and the limit per day is 10

[gamer5289]

We are glad to announce the new Association system.
We will be randomly giving out 3-0 results to whomever we please without any logic.
If your association is a few points away from promotion, !@#$ you.
We dont give a damn, cause we will randonly make you win or lose.
Toss a coin and hope for the best!!!!