In my younger days, I was a right Full Back and I was good, I would stripe the opposition left winger of the ball, and dibble up field passing two or three useless mid-center fielders, and cross to my left attack winger to header for a goal.
There was one time, the opposing central forward was hitting one my girlfriend before the game, well it was his ex-girl friend, ah...long story, but I sent him flying into the stands with a sliding tackle. Well I was 30 lbs and 4 inches taller, and latter on there was a big punch up between us in the box after a corner.
And there was this time, one of the our girl fans was bra-less, and............ . . . . . . . Oh forget it, what was the subject again?