*reuters* leddy fc news

[leddy]

[B]*REUTERS* 20.55


It seems the "Dingle twat" story is gathering momentum as "Dingle for the first time in LEDDY FC history wasn't present at tonights home game, after a 4-1 thrashing (the worse in their history) earlier in CL it was reported that his head was on the line. "Dingle" was found slumped over a bar in the East End

"Dingle" said to a journo " whats the point ? I didnt turn up and look they win 7-0, this game is a joke"


In other news...THIS IS TRUE

Ref found beheaded and decapatated in Brazil after a match !!!!!!...This is scary !

[July Fourth]

*REUTERS* 01.00

Leddy FC are in deep discussions with an unnamed striker from Guyana... He is believed to be talented enough to take the club back towards the CL final for the second successive season. However manager Dingle Twat was unavailable to make a comment.

[leddy]

[QUOTE=July Fourth;119551]*REUTERS* 01.00

Leddy FC are in deep discussions with an unnamed striker from Guyana... He is believed to be talented enough to take the club back towards the CL final for the second successive season. However manager Dingle Twat was unavailable to make a comment.[/QUOTE


REUTERS

Dingle Twat reunited with the team today, after getting messages of support from Peeps in California and a tip off for a striker from Guyana it seems the rift between Vlad (the) Inhaler have been patched up for now, with LEDDY FC third in CL group on 3 points ,four points behind 2nd place with two games to go ,its do or die.

"Twat" I was at a low ebb but we know what we have to do, we play the team in 2nd place and have to win, our last game is against the team at the bottom...we need two wins to be on 9 points and hope the team in 2nd loose on the final game to the top team who are steam rolling through. We have to do this for the memory of "Norma" she would always go down (fighting), so we must also as a squad. Its been difficult season, yes we are top of the league but the cupo cometitions are a different story, we won again 7-0 in league today but tonights 2nd leg cup game we r 1-0 down and away to a team 2 levels higher, we have had an injury every day so far in this campaign, I hope our luck changes as want to make LEDDY FC last season a good one"


In other news...Controversial ref Helmet Cheese is out of action for 3 weeks with a groin strain after a player accidentally kicked him in the Goulashes

[leddy]

*Reuters*


News has just come in that LEDDY FC have just signed "Andre Costa Brazilano" the smooth shaven South American GK, a five star wizzard for a bargain 3 tokens.

First team coach "Maurice Glib" Andreas our presnt Gk had a great season last time around, but his form has been off this year, it happens from time to time and we have brought in "Andre" who has experience playing...been there done that and will hopefully help us get through the CL group as been leaking goals there....Andre will get some games in the league still as his form is great there".

[Phil Scrivener]

Maybe need to change your goalkeeping coach as well. I find european are better our two asian keeper coaches Lit Sum IN and Won Cant Dive where very poor and south american coach Quanot Save was useless, Italians and English seem to be best, the German Hans Tied was not bad with his feet but no good with one on one situations, We use Stan Tall from England priceless I tell ya .

[leddy]

Maybe need to change your goalkeeping coach as well. I find european are better our two asian keeper coaches Lit Sum IN and Won Cant Dive where very poor and south american coach Quanot Save was useless, Italians and English seem to be best, the German Hans Tied was not bad with his feet but no good with one on one situations, We use Stan Tall from England priceless I tell ya .

Hey i like it lol, someone is playing along.....

[leddy]

*REUTERS* 20.45

It seems thing are looking up for LEDDY FC since Dingle Twat came back after his self pity binge, the club won 7-0 away in league today and got through to the 4th round (1/8) of the cup for the first time in the clubs short history, it was after coming from a 1-0 defeat to win 2-1 on agg after extra time in tonights away return match to a team 2 levels above. "Twat" said " "we are delighted with the result.......Football Bloody hell"


Although Drama still seems to follow this club after club Physio "Morgan Sheman" came in to day and told the club he would like to be known as "Megan Sheman" from now on. "Maurice Glib" said "Well, you can tell by the way I use my walk,
I'm a woman's man: no time to talk"

[zJordan]

*REUTERS* 21.40

Wolf FC Chairman has wished Leddy FC good luck in their quest to qualify past the group stages. Additionally manager Jordan White stated that we too face a similar dilemma in the group stages, although performance has DRASTICALLY improved in recent weeks we must win the next game against Athletico and hope that those in second place lose their final game (unlikely).

Wolf FC Manager Jordan White ALSO stated that their star striker and cousin to the manager "Craig White" has suffered injury and Michu will take the striker duties until Craig White has recovered. Craig currently holds top scorer of last season and currently leading by 1 goal, its generally expected Michu will take the goal-scoring record from Craig this season as he is a new-signing and scored 7 goals in the Second leg cup match.

He also said "I'm glad that performance has picked up because Arroyo Joker had joked about mounting my head on a spike outside the Wolf Arena. Somehow I thought he was serious - however we're now on a 5-win streak in all competitions."

[leddy]

*Reuters*


LEDDY FC crunch CL must win game is all set for later today, They have to win away against 2nd place Athletic Cordobes Sad to have any slim hope of progressing to knockout rounds. A win will then leave them one point behind Athletic with one game to go. A draw or loss and its Venetion blinds for them.

Physio "Morgan Sheman" said " Can you please call me Megan"

Reporter "Sam Scoop" " Sorry Megan"

Megan Sheman " I have worked on all the players , just DMC Theo Giddens is out still, I am afraid our facilities are not up to scratch yet. After some good turn of form we feel confident that we can win in Spain"

"Megan" refused to answer any questions about rumours that "Helmet Cheese" is dating her since becoming Megan.

[leddy]

*REUTERS*


Just in that Physio "Morgan Sheman" or Megan as they like to be known as now failed to get on plane to Spain for this afternoons CL game for LEDDY FC......reports say "Sheman" travelled to the airport with the squad but at check in vanished. It is believed that she met "Helmet Cheese" at another check in to go to an at the moment unknown destination.

The squad has landed and are having a light work out where Striker "Ritchie Blackmore" spoke to Sky sports " we know the position and we feel we can beat Athletic as we should have won at home in 1st leg, we shall make them "Burn" and I hopefully will be a "Speed King". Its a great stadium on the side of the lake here and hope to rip up some "Smoke on (by) the Water" by final whistle".