*reuters* leddy fc news

[leddy]

LEDDY FC NEWS

Chairman Willie Hat has been in talks with Rasputin Bollocksvich and is to sign him season after next when he is released from Prison.

Tickets go on sale for CL Final in Barcelona tomorrow morning, season ticket holders will have first bite at the 35,000 seats given to LEDDY FC, There are to be extra flights for fans laid on at London gatwick airport.

Helmet Cheese autopsy showed that what actually finally killed him after the grating was a piece of potato lodged in his head, this had been lodged there since two seasons ago after CL Final when an irate fan had a pop at him., he would have died whatever, it was just a matter of time when the potato piece moved and cut off the supply of blood.


SKY NEWS

Reporter Sam Scoop has gone into a clinic after the death of Helmet Cheese, he said" I will miss reporting on him and the chase etc, I guess its back to reporting on that crap team LEDDY FC again, oh well , shame the team Clitlips didn't make it to the cup final after loosing their semi final as I could of had the headline "Clits slips thru to Final"....Oh well"