*REUTERS*

LEDDY FC win the league yesterday, the trophy will be awarded at their last home game of the season tomorrow. "The Norma(the milky bars are on me) Stitz" stand will be rocking with joy.

"Durex" have been confirmed as new owners of LEDDY FC, "Willie Hat" will become chairman and "Dingle Twat" will be back as manager. "Hat" said the first home game of next season we will be giving away to all fans free "rib Ticklers".

"Maurice Glib" will step down as caretaker but will not go back to being 1st team coach, he is retiring to Massachusetts.

Physio "Megan Sheman" will remain at the club, insiders say that youth team coach "Wallygong Fosters" will become first team coach.


*FOX NEWS*

"KOCH and CHEESE" have been found onboard a ship, with the help of "Wolf FC" and the Wolfman, goverments of the world, they will now face trial at the international court of justice at "The HAGUE". This of course is the country where the biggest crime of "Helmet Cheeses's" list of crimes first took place...last years Champions league final penalty fiasco where LEDDY FC where robbed. Sweet irony indeed.